WINTER PARK  |  Paulina Toledo is a loving mom, wife and pro-life advocate. She is mother to four children, two in heaven.

“I think when you’re given the gift of being a mom, especially after experiencing two miscarriages, you know when you’re given the gift of life and you fervently want to protect it and advocate for it,” she said.

Toledo felt comfortable discussing her experiences thanks to the Kingdom of Heaven ministry at Queen of Angels, which provides burial for miscarried children and babies who died shortly after birth.

The first miscarriage occurred when her son was six months old, and she just learned she was pregnant again. Excited, she told her husband, Ivan, and they shared the good news with their mothers. The next day, she began miscarrying. She was only five weeks along. She had what doctors called a chemical pregnancy. The embryo implanted in the uterine wall and stopped developing. Because of its nature, there was nothing to bury. Still, she and Ivan named their child Marylily, after their mothers Maria and Liliana.

Her second miscarriage was much more difficult, but still she felt God’s mercy. “I was eight weeks pregnant. It was the Monday before I was supposed to hear his heartbeat. We believe it was a boy. We named him Santiago. We were going to make sure everything was okay,” she recalled.

Because of her previous miscarriage, she immediately recognized the signs when the pain and cramping started. Even before the quickly rescheduled ultrasound, she said she knew.

“My child was more than a clump of cells. I knew he most likely had a heart that was beating. I knew that he looked like a little jellybean.”  Later that day, her miscarriage progressed. “I saw my son. I held my son. So, I knew this was my baby. It was unlike my first son, who I was able to snuggle with in the hospital and kiss him. This was our meeting. This was the first time I was able to hold him in my home, in the bathroom. And this is just how I was going to welcome him into the world and send him back home to Jesus,” she said.

Because of that, she called Deacon Mark Fry at Queen of Angels Cemetery in Winter Park. “God just gave him this grace to be able to minister to me in that moment,” she recalled.

Coordinating with their partners in the Kingdom of Heaven ministry, he called DeGusipe Funeral Home. “We were able to lay our son to rest, have a beautiful ceremony, and give our son that dignity, that peace to be rested there,” she said. “It’s very gracious to enter into that healing because of that ministry.”

About a month later, she became pregnant again. Her daughter is due in November.

Although she acknowledged some fear of miscarrying again, she said there is also joy because the two children she lost are already in heaven. “As parents our goal is for our kids to get to heaven… two of my babies already made it. They’re in heaven. They’re praying for us and they’re interceding for us. That’s all we want,” she said.

Within her grief she’s found healing. “The grief just sanctifies you, honestly, because whenever we grieve, we unite our heart to Jesus. So, from the beginning, when I found out we were pregnant again, I said, ‘Lord, it’s up to you. If you want her to come home now or if you want her to enter into this world, we’re going to do everything in our power to get her back home to you,’” she prayed. “When you’re open to life, you’re also open to the end of that life and you’re open to surrendering the life you create to God.”

Deacon Fry considers it a blessing to accompany families at such a sensitive time. His work at Queen of Angels began in December 2024. “I didn’t know the scope of it. I have to guard my own mind and heart at times because I can get caught up in it as well,” he said. “It’s heartbreaking at a whole different level, but having this opportunity has been overwhelmingly positive.”

Deacon Fry has presided over prayer services for babies lost at five weeks up to children one week old. Not all of the families are Catholic.

“We have a number of families that are Baptist or claim no faith at the moment, but are more than willing to allow this random Catholic deacon to talk to them about their lives and come out for a service early on a Saturday morning, in a more private setting, before the cemetery opens up,” he said. “They allow me to walk with them and allow the cemetery to be a place of healing for them.”

Many families hear about the ministry by word of mouth or from area hospitals. Deacon Walt Skinner is a chaplain at Winnie Palmer and frequently refers families suffering loss. Deacon Fry calls him “the ministry’s greatest champion” as he shares flyers about the ministry and encourages all chaplains, regardless of their faith affiliation, to seek a sacred burial for miscarried children.

Recently, 122 names were engraved on a stone commemorating the children buried since 2021.

Deacon Fry said the ministry is also a form of evangelization. “No matter what (the parents) know about the Catholic faith, to see that we’re open to and welcome anyone to one of the Corporal Works of Mercy — burying the dead — is meaningful. Jesus talks about it in the Bible, so people have read it and know it. But Jesus never said anything in the Bible about what faith they had to be. We’re following that same model. We’re making it available with the understanding you’re going to see a deacon there and there will be a prayer service.” He said the service is also biblical. “I’ve never had anyone, when I ask them to bow their head and pray for God’s blessing, say, ‘No, thank you.’ No one turns down a blessing from God. It’s the greatest part for me to impart a blessing to anyone that crosses our path.”

He added, “It’s an opportunity during one of the saddest times of a person’s life. It’s a moment when the Lord is trying to give the greatest healing possible to them. And to be open to that is such a blessing.”

To learn more about the Kingdom of Heaven ministry or to contact the Queen of Angels Cemetery in Winter Park, click here.

Watch a video about the ministry here.

By Glenda Meekins of the Florida Catholic staff, August 21, 2025